Can Two People with ADHD Live Together Successfully?

Can Two People with ADHD Live Together? The Challenges and Possibilities
Understanding ADHD in Relationships
Well, first things first: ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is not just a "distraction" or "lack of focus" issue; it's a complex neurodevelopmental condition that affects everything from attention span to emotional regulation. So, when two people with ADHD decide to live together, it’s a mix of challenges and, believe it or not, advantages too.
Honestly, I’ve had a conversation about this with my friend Emma, who’s been in a long-term relationship with someone who also has ADHD. She’s constantly grappling with the highs and lows of their dynamic. She once told me, “It’s like living in a whirlwind, but sometimes that whirlwind is exactly what we need!” And that pretty much sums up the experience of two ADHD individuals living together.
The Challenges of Living Together with ADHD
Disorganization
Let’s not sugarcoat it. One of the biggest challenges of living with ADHD—whether you have it yourself or you're living with someone who does—is the lack of organization. Tasks like cleaning, planning meals, or even remembering important dates can slip through the cracks. So, if both partners struggle with this, it can feel like an endless cycle of frustration. Picture this: the laundry piles up, you both forget to pay the bills, and then suddenly, the house feels like a chaotic mess. Trust me, I’ve been there (more times than I care to admit).
Impulsivity and Emotional Reactions
Another thing that makes it tricky for two ADHD partners to live together is impulsivity. ADHD can make someone act without thinking, which, in the context of a relationship, can lead to spur-of-the-moment decisions that might not always be the best ones. I remember a conversation with my friend Dave—he’s got ADHD, and his partner does too—and he told me, “It’s like we’re both in a race to make decisions without stopping to breathe.” Emotional reactions can also be heightened, making it harder to manage disagreements calmly.
Can Two People with ADHD Make it Work?
Okay, let’s take a step back. While it sounds like a lot, it’s not impossible for two people with ADHD to live harmoniously together. In fact, there are some surprising benefits that can come with it.
Shared Understanding and Empathy
The best part about having a partner who shares your struggles? Understanding. You get it. You both know what it's like to forget things, to get overwhelmed, or to find it impossible to sit still sometimes. Emma once said, "It's a weird kind of comfort knowing that we’re in this mess together." This shared experience can create an incredible bond that strengthens the relationship, as you’re both in the same boat.
Creative Problem Solving
If you both have ADHD, you’re probably excellent at thinking outside the box. When things go wrong (as they often do), you’ll probably find creative ways to fix them. You’re both used to coming up with new strategies for dealing with disorganization, distractions, and emotional turbulence. For instance, I know a couple who set up a "communication board" in their kitchen—a simple whiteboard where they write down tasks, reminders, and plans to avoid the typical forgetfulness that comes with ADHD.
Tips for Making It Work
Alright, let’s get real here. It’s not all sunshine and rainbows, but with a little effort, you can make it work. Here are some tips I’ve picked up from people I know who’ve been in this situation.
Set Up Routines and Systems
Having routines is crucial. I know, I know, routines are hard for ADHD brains, but the trick is to make them flexible. For example, setting up a daily "check-in" session where you both talk about what’s on your to-do list can help avoid tasks falling through the cracks. Trust me, it makes a world of difference.
Practice Patience and Communication
Patience is a skill you’ll need to develop. ADHD can make it hard to communicate effectively—especially when emotions are high—but it’s important to talk things through and express your needs calmly. And remember, sometimes, silence can speak volumes. I’ve seen people with ADHD use their own form of "time-outs" to de-escalate before talking things through.
Delegate Tasks Based on Strengths
You both have strengths (believe me). One of you might be great at big-picture thinking, while the other excels at details. Assign tasks based on these strengths. This prevents the feeling of one person doing all the work. I’ve heard of couples with ADHD dividing responsibilities in creative ways—one person handles all the scheduling, while the other deals with budgeting, for example.
Conclusion: Is it Possible?
Honestly, living with someone who has ADHD can be a rollercoaster ride, and when both partners have ADHD, it can feel like you’re on a never-ending loop of highs and lows. But it’s not all bad. You’ve got the empathy, the understanding, and the creativity to make it work. Will it be easy? Probably not. But if you’re both committed and willing to put in the work, it can be a fulfilling and dynamic partnership.
As my friend Emma likes to say, "We might not always have it all together, but we sure know how to make it fun." So, if you and your partner both have ADHD, don’t be discouraged. With some patience, understanding, and a little bit of humor, living together can absolutely be a beautiful thing.
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The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.
Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?
How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).
How tall is a average 15 year old?
Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years
Male Teens: 13 - 20 Years) | ||
---|---|---|
14 Years | 112.0 lb. (50.8 kg) | 64.5" (163.8 cm) |
15 Years | 123.5 lb. (56.02 kg) | 67.0" (170.1 cm) |
16 Years | 134.0 lb. (60.78 kg) | 68.3" (173.4 cm) |
17 Years | 142.0 lb. (64.41 kg) | 69.0" (175.2 cm) |
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Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.