Do Autistic Kids Love Their Parents? Understanding the Deep Connection

The Complexity of Love in Autism

Well, here's a question that’s often on people’s minds: "Do autistic kids love their parents?" Honestly, it's not an easy one to answer. Autistic children express emotions differently, and this can sometimes lead to confusion about the depth of their feelings. But the truth is, yes, they do love their parents – it’s just that the way they show it might not be what we typically expect.

It’s easy to assume that love looks the same for everyone. You know, the hugs, the "I love you"s, the cute drawings with hearts. But for autistic children, love might be displayed in more subtle, unique ways. I’ve had a conversation with a close friend who has an autistic son, and she shared her frustration about not always being able to "feel" the love in the traditional sense. But after learning more about autism, she realized the love was there – just communicated differently.

Understanding Love Beyond Conventional Expressions

For autistic children, sensory sensitivities, communication challenges, and social differences mean that their expressions of love might not look like the "standard" behavior. They may not offer affection in ways that are familiar, like saying "I love you" or seeking physical closeness when you're upset. Instead, love might come through in quiet gestures or in the way they respond to you when they need comfort.

I remember a moment when my friend's son, let’s call him Jake, didn’t speak much, and there were times when his lack of verbal affection made her feel uncertain about his feelings. But then, one day, Jake handed her a crumpled drawing – it was simple, nothing special by artistic standards – but it was a piece of his world. That moment was an eye-opener. The love was there, just in a different form.

Different Ways Autistic Children Show Affection

Quiet Moments of Comfort

One way autistic children often show their affection is through quiet, non-verbal actions. It could be sitting next to you, staying close during a stressful moment, or making eye contact. These small, often overlooked actions are huge indicators of attachment and love. They might not always demand your attention or initiate a cuddle, but they’re there when you need them the most.

I’ve noticed that sometimes, when a child on the spectrum is stressed or overwhelmed, simply being present can be their way of expressing trust and affection. It's not about needing constant affection – it's about knowing that you’re there and that you're safe.

Special Interests as a Love Language

Honestly, I didn’t fully grasp this concept until a few years ago. A friend of mine, whose daughter is autistic, explained to me how her child’s "special interest" – a deep, almost obsessive focus on a particular thing – was her way of connecting. It was fascinating! Her daughter would spend hours researching the things she loved and would share what she learned, not out of a desire for validation, but as a way to bond. For her, sharing knowledge was an act of love, a way to say, "I want you to be part of my world." That blew my mind.

Physical Affection on Their Terms

Some autistic children might show love through physical touch, but it has to be on their own terms. It could be a gentle hand placed on yours, or simply leaning against you during a quiet moment. They may avoid hugging, but that doesn't mean they don't care. Each child is different, and it’s important to respect their personal space and boundaries while also being open to their way of showing affection.

The Emotional Depth of Autism and Love

You might be wondering, "But, do they feel love as deeply as others?" Well, the answer is yes – the emotional depth in autistic children is profound, though it can sometimes be harder for them to express in ways that are easily understood. Love is a complex emotion, and while it may not always be accompanied by outward signs of affection, autistic children feel it in their own way.

My colleague, who has an autistic daughter, once told me about a situation that made her question her daughter’s feelings. Her daughter was having a rough time, refusing to speak or engage for several days. She felt distant and couldn't understand why. But after a week of quiet togetherness, her daughter just leaned over and held her hand. It wasn’t dramatic, but in that moment, the connection was unmistakable. It was like a silent "I love you" – and it was enough.

Understanding the Challenges of Expressing Love

For many parents of autistic children, the struggle is not about whether their child loves them, but about how to interpret the signs. The challenges of communication, sensory overload, and emotional regulation can make it difficult for children on the spectrum to express love in ways that align with societal norms.

So, it’s important to approach this with patience and understanding. If you’re a parent or caregiver, take time to learn how your child communicates their affection. Don't be discouraged by moments of silence or withdrawal. These are often just signs that your child needs space or is dealing with sensory overload.

The Role of Routine in Love Expression

For many autistic children, love is expressed through routine and predictability. A child might not always give a hug, but they may look forward to certain family rituals. Whether it’s a bedtime routine, a shared activity, or a specific time of day when they know you’ll be there, these routines create a foundation of trust and love.

I’ve seen it in action. A friend’s daughter has a particular bedtime routine that involves her dad reading a story. Even though she doesn’t always show overt affection, the way she leans into him when he reads shows that she values the time and the connection. It’s her own, personal way of showing love.

Conclusion: Love Is There, Just in Their Own Way

Honestly, when you ask "Do autistic kids love their parents?" the answer is a resounding yes. It may not always be obvious, but it’s there in the quiet moments, the special interests, the routines, and even in the small gestures. Love in the autistic world might look a little different, but it’s just as deep, if not deeper.

So, if you’re a parent of an autistic child, don’t get discouraged if you’re not receiving affection in ways you’re used to. Instead, focus on the unique, profound ways they express their love. And, remember, you don’t need to hear "I love you" to know it’s true.

Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?

The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.