Is It Pathetic to Have No Friends? Exploring the Truth Behind Loneliness

The First Question: Is It Really "Pathetic"?

So, you’ve found yourself wondering: "Is it pathetic to have no friends?" Maybe you've seen your friends hanging out, posting pictures, or talking about their latest adventures. You’re left feeling a little... well, out of place. It’s easy to start thinking something’s wrong with you, right?

Honestly, I’ve been there. A while back, I was scrolling through social media (classic, I know), and I couldn't help but feel a twinge of envy. Everyone seemed to have a tight-knit circle, and there I was, struggling to make plans. Is it pathetic? Well, it’s complicated.

Let’s break this down.

Why We Fear the Word "Pathetic"

Society’s Obsession with Friendship

We live in a world that glorifies friendship. Think about it—TV shows, movies, social media—everything seems to emphasize the idea that having a group of friends is the "norm." But here’s the thing: That’s not the reality for everyone.

I had this conversation with my friend Jessica last week. She mentioned how she feels a bit isolated lately, not having a huge social circle, and I was like, "But you’re not alone!" She looked at me and said, "It’s just that everyone else has a big group of friends. Maybe it’s pathetic to not have any."

It hit me then—this idea that being "friendless" makes you "pathetic" is so ingrained in us. But why is that? Well, society tends to equate social connections with personal worth. If you’re alone, there must be something wrong, right? Spoiler alert: No, that’s not the case.

Loneliness: More Common Than You Think

You’re Not Alone in Feeling Alone

You’re not the only one feeling like you don’t fit in with the "friend group" crowd. Trust me. Studies show that loneliness is a major issue, and it's on the rise. According to a 2021 study by Cigna, nearly 61% of Americans reported feeling lonely. And you know what? It's not just about having zero friends—it’s about the quality of your connections.

I remember a time when I was surrounded by people, but still felt deeply alone. I thought something was wrong with me because I didn't have that deep connection with others. But, here's the thing: Loneliness isn’t just about numbers. It’s about how you feel when you're with people. Sometimes, being surrounded by a lot of people can actually make you feel more isolated. It's the quality of the connection that matters most.

Is Loneliness Really a Bad Thing?

Okay, this is where I changed my mind a bit. Initially, I was like, "Oh man, I should have more friends. That’s the solution!" But I started to realize that loneliness, in moderation, isn't necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it can even be productive.

Solitude gives you time to reflect, to grow, and to focus on things you truly care about. I've had some of my best creative breakthroughs when I was alone. It’s during those moments of quiet that I’ve truly learned about myself. Sometimes, it’s okay to be alone.

When “Having No Friends” Doesn’t Mean There’s a Problem

Self-Reflection: Is It a Choice or a Circumstance?

So, is it pathetic to have no friends? It really depends on the context. Are you choosing solitude, or is it something that you feel is being forced upon you?

Some people genuinely prefer to be alone. There’s no shame in that. Introverts, for example, might find socializing draining. For them, having a small circle or even no circle at all feels more natural. I spoke to my cousin Laura, who is a proud introvert, and she said, “I don’t have a lot of friends, but that’s because I like to keep things quiet. It’s not pathetic—it’s just who I am.”

When It’s a Sign to Reach Out

On the flip side, if you’re feeling lonely and want to connect but just don’t know how, that’s okay too. Sometimes, it’s about learning how to put yourself out there. I’ve made the mistake of waiting for others to reach out, thinking, "Why is no one contacting me?" but then realized I hadn’t been making an effort either.

It’s easy to get stuck in the mindset that others should initiate everything. But if you’re looking to change things, don’t be afraid to reach out. Start small—send a text, join a hobby group, or simply invite someone to coffee. You don’t have to throw a party, but initiating connections can slowly help you build your social circle.

Redefining What “Having Friends” Means

Quality Over Quantity

Having a friend is not about the number of people on your phone. Honestly, I’ve had "friends" that didn’t feel like real friends at all—more like acquaintances. It wasn’t until I found a few people with whom I really connected that I started to understand the importance of quality over quantity.

If you don’t have a massive group of friends, that's totally fine. One or two close relationships are way more meaningful than 20 shallow ones. And you know what? That's not pathetic. It’s human. Real relationships are rare, and that's something to be proud of when you find them.

Conclusion: Embrace Your Own Path

So, is it pathetic to have no friends? Absolutely not. It’s totally okay to go through phases where you’re not surrounded by people. Loneliness can be a sign that you need time to reflect or that you need to focus on building quality relationships rather than numbers.

And hey, you’re not alone in this. Lots of people are going through the same thing. It might not feel like it, but that’s the truth.

Don't let society make you feel like you're missing something. It’s okay to take your time and find the connections that truly matter. Whether you’re someone who loves solitude or someone who’s just looking for a few deep friendships, there’s no "right" way to navigate life.

If you’re feeling down about it, reach out to someone—whether it’s an old friend or a new one—and remember that it’s never too late to make meaningful connections.

Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?

The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.