When Should You Talk About Wanting Kids? Timing Matters More Than You Think

Why it’s such a loaded topic

Talking about wanting kids isn’t like asking where someone wants to eat. It’s emotional. It’s vulnerable. And depending on your relationship stage, it can either strengthen your bond—or make things awkward, fast.

For some, having children is a non-negotiable life goal. For others, it’s a “maybe someday” or even a “hard pass.” That’s why choosing when to bring it up is just as important as what you say.

And yeah, the timing can feel tricky. Like… when is it too soon, and when is it too late?

Early dating: Should you bring it up right away?

First few dates — nah, slow down

If you’re on date two and already talking baby names, it might freak the other person out. Most people are still figuring out if there’s even chemistry. Doesn’t mean you’re wrong for thinking about the future—it just might not be the moment.

BUT—(yep, here’s the “but”)—if kids are that important to you, it’s okay to signal your values early. Maybe casually say something like,
"I’ve always imagined having a family someday, but I know that’s not for everyone."

That kind of vibe-check opens the door without setting off alarms.

Red flags to watch for

If the other person immediately shuts it down or makes weird jokes like “Oh, kids are the worst,” it might be worth keeping that in mind. Doesn’t mean ghost them right away—but hey, now you know what kind of chat may be coming later.

The relationship is getting serious… now what?

Around the 3–6 month mark

Once you’ve moved out of the “just talking” phase and into something real, this convo gets more relevant. You’re meeting each other’s friends. Maybe family. Maybe even doing laundry together (which is strangely intimate).

This is when you want to start getting clarity—not necessarily on timelines, but on desire.

Ask open-ended questions:

• “Have you ever pictured yourself as a parent?”

• “Do you think you'd want kids one day?”

Keep it chill. You're just feeling things out.

What if you disagree?

Well… this sucks, but it happens. Maybe you really want kids and your partner is “not sure.” That’s a huge value mismatch. If neither of you changes your mind later, you could be headed for real heartbreak.

You don’t need to end things right away, but you do need to be honest with yourself. Pretending it'll work out somehow isn’t love—it’s avoidance.

Long-term commitment? You have to talk specifics

Engagement, living together, marriage — the stakes are higher

This is where the conversation needs to move from "do you want kids?" to "when, how many, and what’s our plan if we can’t have them biologically?"

Yeah, it’s heavy. And yeah, it’s necessary. Because if you're putting rings on fingers or signing leases together, you need to be aligned. Or at least transparent about your visions.

Funny enough, one couple I knew waited until they were engaged to talk seriously about children. Turned out one was open to adoption and the other wasn’t at all. It led to months of back-and-forth—and real emotional pain. Lesson learned? Talk earlier than you think you need to.

How to bring it up without making it weird

• Pick the right moment (not in the middle of a fight or during Netflix & pizza night)

• Make it about your vision, not expectations:
  “I've always imagined having a family one day. What’s that look like for you?”

• Avoid pressure language: Saying "I need an answer now" will only stress things

• Listen, really listen, to their answer—even if it’s not what you want to hear

Final thoughts: It’s not about the perfect time—it’s about being honest

So when should you talk about wanting kids? Honestly? As soon as it’s real enough that the answer matters. That might be date 10, month 3, or somewhere in between. What matters is not rushing—or avoiding—it.

Because if kids are part of your future, you deserve someone who wants to walk into that future with you. Eyes open, hearts aligned.

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The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.