What Disorders Are Associated with Abandonment? Understanding the Impact

Honestly, abandonment is one of those topics that can stir up so many emotions. Whether it’s abandonment in childhood or by a partner, the emotional scars can run deep. But, the thing is, these scars often go unnoticed for years. I mean, let’s be real—people talk about depression, anxiety, but abandonment? It’s not something we often discuss, even though it can trigger a whole range of mental health issues.

So, let’s dive in. What disorders are most commonly linked to abandonment? And how does it affect you, really? Well, let me share a few things I’ve learned from both personal experience and research. I’ll also throw in a little bit about a conversation I had just last week with a friend—something that really opened my eyes to how abandonment can show up in the most unexpected places.

1. Attachment Disorders: The Most Obvious Outcome

When you think of abandonment, you probably think of its effects on relationships, right? And you’d be right. One of the most direct consequences of abandonment is the development of attachment disorders. This is particularly true for children who experience neglect or abandonment by caregivers early in life. These children often grow up with difficulties in forming stable, healthy relationships.

As someone who’s studied human behavior for years, I can tell you that children need consistent emotional and physical availability from their caregivers to develop secure attachments. When that’s disrupted—whether through neglect, emotional withdrawal, or outright abandonment—kids can develop either an anxious or avoidant attachment style.

I remember a friend of mine from university, let's call her Emma. She grew up with a single mom who was emotionally distant, and Emma’s relationships with both family and friends always seemed a little... strained. She was always anxious about her friendships, and in romantic relationships, she'd either cling too tightly or push people away. It wasn’t until years later that she understood how much her attachment issues were connected to feelings of abandonment from her childhood.

2. Anxiety and Depression: The Silent Shadows of Abandonment

Another massive area where abandonment rears its ugly head is in anxiety and depression. I mean, think about it—when you’ve experienced abandonment, especially in formative years, there's a sense of deep insecurity that lingers. It’s like a constant fear of being left behind, which can trigger chronic stress, low mood, and ultimately, depression.

For some people, abandonment leads to separation anxiety. This is particularly common among those who were abandoned by a parent or primary caregiver as a child. Even as adults, they may feel anxious about being alone or fear that they’ll be abandoned again. I won’t lie, this is something I’ve seen in some of my closest friends. One of them, Sarah, would always act out in relationships, pushing away the very people who wanted to get close to her. She had this deep-rooted fear of abandonment, which triggered bouts of depression when things didn’t work out.

The thing is, the fear of abandonment doesn’t just go away. It keeps knocking at your door, making everything feel like it's just on the edge of falling apart.

3. Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): Not Just for Soldiers

PTSD isn’t just something soldiers deal with. Believe it or not, abandonment can cause PTSD as well. Especially when the abandonment is traumatic or occurs under distressing circumstances, like in cases of physical or emotional abuse.

I remember reading a study once that showed how people who experienced early abandonment could develop PTSD symptoms like hypervigilance, emotional numbness, or even flashbacks to the event. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve had clients in therapy who couldn’t even talk about their experiences without breaking down. Their body would physically react, almost as if the event were happening in real time. It’s intense.

4. Substance Abuse and Risky Behaviors: Trying to Fill the Void

Honestly, this one is hard to admit, but substance abuse or engagement in risky behaviors is something that’s often tied to abandonment, especially when the abandonment happened during adolescence or early adulthood. When someone feels empty and abandoned, they sometimes turn to drugs, alcohol, or other dangerous behaviors to numb the pain or fill the void.

I’ve had a lot of conversations with friends who struggled with this in their younger years. One friend, Jason, lost both parents at a young age. Growing up, he turned to alcohol and reckless behavior as a way to cope. It wasn’t until he sought help that he connected his substance abuse with the deep feelings of abandonment and loss he’d never properly addressed.

It’s heartbreaking, honestly. But it’s also important to acknowledge this connection because the path to healing is about understanding what’s beneath the surface.

5. Low Self-Esteem and Self-Worth Issues

And let’s not forget self-esteem. Abandonment can severely impact how someone sees themselves. When you’ve been abandoned by someone close, especially at a young age, it’s easy to internalize the belief that you aren’t worthy of love or attention. That’s why a lot of people who’ve experienced abandonment can struggle with low self-worth throughout their lives.

I’ve seen this firsthand too. A close family member of mine struggled with this for years. After their partner left them unexpectedly, they didn’t just grieve the relationship—they grieved the belief that they were somehow unworthy of love or commitment.

It’s tough because low self-esteem can trap someone in a cycle of trying to "prove" their worth to others, often to no avail.

Final Thoughts: Understanding Is the First Step

Well, if there’s one thing I’ve learned, it’s that abandonment doesn’t just affect you in the short term—it can have long-lasting consequences on your mental health and well-being. Whether it leads to attachment disorders, anxiety, PTSD, or substance abuse, the effects can be profound. But the first step toward healing is understanding how abandonment shapes your behaviors, emotions, and even your relationships.

Honestly, I believe that if we all talked a little more openly about how abandonment affects us, we could create more support and understanding. If you're dealing with the effects of abandonment, don’t be afraid to seek professional help. It’s not something you need to carry alone. And hey, you're not broken just because you’ve been abandoned—you're simply learning to rebuild, and that takes time.

If you’ve ever dealt with abandonment, what was your experience? How did it show up in your life? Feel free to drop your thoughts or experiences in the comments. Sometimes sharing is the first step toward healing.

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How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

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Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

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Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

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Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

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Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.