What Kind of People Avoid Conflict and Why?

What Kind of People Avoid Conflict? Understanding the Dynamics

Why Do Some People Avoid Conflict?

Conflict is a natural part of human interaction, yet some people seem to go out of their way to avoid it. Why is that? Do they fear confrontation, or is it something deeper, like a need for peace and harmony? If you’ve ever wondered about the personalities that shy away from conflict, this article is for you.

I remember a conversation with a close friend, Lisa, who admitted that she would rather walk away than argue, even if it meant sacrificing her point of view. It made me realize that avoiding conflict isn’t always about weakness—it can be tied to a variety of psychological factors. Let's dive in and explore the kinds of people who tend to avoid conflict, and the reasons behind this behavior.

1. People with High Empathy

1.1. Why Empathy Leads to Conflict Avoidance

Empathetic people are sensitive to the emotions of others, and this sensitivity often leads them to avoid conflict. They understand how arguments can hurt people, and this awareness can make them uncomfortable with confrontation.

I’ve seen this firsthand with my friend, Clara. She’s always been the type to "smooth things over" when tensions arise, because she genuinely feels for the other person. While this can be an admirable trait, it sometimes means that her feelings get overlooked in the process.

Empathetic people might avoid conflict because they fear causing emotional pain or alienating others. For them, peace and emotional balance are highly valued, often at the expense of addressing the root of a problem.

1.2. The Struggles of Empathic Conflict Avoidance

While empathy is a strength, it can also be a struggle. People who avoid conflict out of empathy might suppress their own needs and desires. I’ve had many discussions with Clara where she’ll admit that she holds back her true feelings just to keep the peace. But is that healthy? Not necessarily. Avoiding conflict in this way can build up resentment over time.

2. People with Low Self-Esteem

2.1. How Low Self-Esteem Affects Conflict Resolution

For some people, conflict feels like a personal attack, and this is often the case for those with low self-esteem. They may fear that engaging in conflict will expose their weaknesses or make them appear inadequate. So, to avoid feeling inferior or inadequate, they choose to withdraw from confrontations.

I recall a time when my colleague, Ben, faced criticism at work. Instead of defending his ideas or engaging in a healthy discussion, he immediately shut down and avoided the conversation. Later, he confided that he wasn’t confident enough to argue his point. This kind of behavior is often rooted in a lack of self-worth.

2.2. The Impact of Avoiding Conflict Due to Low Self-Esteem

While avoiding conflict might seem like a way to protect oneself from hurt, it often leads to a buildup of frustration. People with low self-esteem may struggle to assert themselves and may suffer from inner turmoil, feeling unheard or overlooked. It’s a cycle that becomes hard to break because the fear of conflict keeps them trapped in silence.

3. People Who Value Harmony and Peace

3.1. The Desire for a Calm Environment

Some people simply want to live in harmony and avoid conflict because they cherish peace and tranquility above all else. For them, conflict disrupts the balance they so carefully cultivate in their relationships, whether in family, friendships, or the workplace.

Take my friend Elena, for instance. She is always the peacemaker, striving to make sure everyone is happy and comfortable. But, as I’ve learned, sometimes avoiding conflict means ignoring underlying issues that need to be addressed.

3.2. The Risk of Resentment and Unspoken Issues

While the desire for peace is noble, it’s important to realize that avoiding conflict can lead to resentment. In trying to avoid confrontation, people like Elena might suppress their true emotions and let problems fester. Eventually, this can create an atmosphere of passive-aggressiveness, where the underlying issues never get resolved.

4. People Who Are Conflict-Averse by Nature

4.1. The Personality Traits Behind Conflict Avoidance

Some people are just naturally conflict-averse. This personality trait can manifest in those who are generally passive, introverted, or prefer to avoid stress. These individuals may feel uncomfortable with tension and confrontation, opting for avoidance strategies instead.

I’ve observed this with my friend Max, who is incredibly laid-back and hates any form of tension. If there’s ever a disagreement, Max will quickly change the subject or even walk away, as if it didn’t happen. His personality just seems to shy away from anything that feels remotely like an argument.

4.2. Why Being Conflict-Averse Isn’t Always a Negative Trait

It’s important to note that being conflict-averse doesn’t necessarily mean a person is avoiding growth or change. Some people simply don’t enjoy the discomfort of confrontation and will do whatever they can to maintain a peaceful environment. While this can sometimes lead to missed opportunities for growth, it doesn’t automatically make someone weak or incapable.

5. How to Manage Conflict Avoidance

5.1. Strategies to Overcome the Fear of Conflict

If you recognize yourself in any of these types, it might be worth considering how to approach conflict in a healthy way. One of the first steps is acknowledging that conflict is a natural part of life, and avoiding it can sometimes cause more harm than good. Learning to engage in conflict constructively—by staying calm, listening actively, and expressing your thoughts clearly—can make all the difference.

I’ve had moments where I’ve had to step out of my comfort zone and engage in a difficult conversation. At first, it was uncomfortable, but I quickly realized that confronting the issue, rather than avoiding it, allowed me to feel heard and validated. That’s something I’m still working on, but I’ve learned that conflict doesn’t have to be destructive if it’s handled well.

5.2. Seek Professional Help

For some, conflict avoidance can be deeply ingrained and may stem from past trauma or unresolved emotional issues. If this is the case, seeking the help of a therapist or counselor can help you understand the root causes and work through strategies to engage in conflict in healthier ways.

Conclusion: What Kind of People Avoid Conflict?

In conclusion, people who avoid conflict often fall into certain categories—those with high empathy, low self-esteem, a strong desire for peace, or those simply conflict-averse by nature. Understanding the reasons behind this behavior is key to finding ways to address conflict in a healthier and more constructive manner. While avoiding conflict might seem like an easy way out, it’s important to remember that open communication and addressing issues head-on can lead to stronger, more authentic relationships.

So, next time you encounter someone who avoids conflict, try to see it from their perspective. They might be protecting themselves, or they might just need a little encouragement to open up and engage.

Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?

The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.