What Are the Unwritten Rules of a Mother?

What Are the Rules of a Mother? Love, Limits and Late-Night Chaos

Being a mother isn’t a job. It’s a full-blown universe.

Let’s just be real from the start: there’s no handbook. No golden list that says “Do this and boom, perfect child.”
But somehow—through instinct, culture, and a lot of trial and error—there are some rules mothers follow. Not because they have to, but because they just… do.

I was talking to my friend Elise (mom of three, CEO of chaos) and she said:
"Motherhood is just one long improv show where you're also the janitor, chef, therapist, and occasional bad cop."
Couldn’t have said it better.

So, what are these unspoken rules? They’re not always pretty. But they’re deeply human.

Rule #1: Love hard. Even when you’re exhausted.

Love when they cry, scream, or break your favorite mug

A mother’s love isn’t about Hallmark cards and baby powder commercials. It’s messy. Raw. Loud.
And yes, sometimes it comes with guilt. Because you’re not always patient. You do raise your voice. You do need space.
But the rule still stands: you love them anyway.

When I spilled juice all over my mom’s carpet at age 7 and froze in fear, she just sighed, cleaned it up, and said, “You’re more important than the rug.”
I still remember that line.

Rule #2: Set boundaries even when they hate you for it

You’re not their friend. You’re their anchor.

Let’s be honest: setting limits sucks. No one wants to say no for the 15th time in an hour. But kids need structure. It makes them feel safe—even when they act like it’s a prison sentence.

Things like:

• “No, you can’t stay up till 1am on a school night.”

• “You have to eat something green.”

• “I know you hate me right now, but I’m still not changing the rule.”

You’ll get eye rolls, tantrums, guilt trips. But in the long run? It builds trust.
Even Elise told me once: “I’d rather they hate me for saying no now than resent me for never caring later.”

Rule #3: Show up—physically and emotionally

The power of just being there

You don’t need to fix everything. But being present matters more than you think.

• Being at the school play, even if they don’t see you

• Holding them when they’re sick, even if you’re sick too

• Just listening when they sob over something you don’t understand

Presence doesn’t mean perfection. It means being human in front of your child—and showing them it’s okay to be one.

One time, my mom sat with me for three hours on the bathroom floor during a teenage breakdown. She didn’t say much. Just sat. That was enough.

Rule #4: Forgive yourself, constantly

You’re gonna mess up. It’s part of the job.

Every mother I know has regrets. They’ve yelled, forgotten appointments, handed the iPad over too fast, given cereal for dinner three nights in a row.
It happens. The real rule is: don’t stay stuck in shame.

Say sorry when you need to. Laugh at the chaos. Keep going.

Elise said something that stuck: “Motherhood taught me how to forgive someone I love. And that person is me.”

Rule #5: Let go, little by little

They were never meant to stay small forever

This one hurts. It sneaks up on you in the form of empty shoes, quieter dinners, and less text messages.
The real rule of motherhood? You raise them to leave you.

But they carry you with them. In how they love. In how they speak to themselves. In how they make tea when they’re sad—just like you did.

So, what are the rules of a mother?

They’re not in any book. They live in the moments between the meltdowns and the milestones.
They change as your kids change. And yeah, sometimes you forget them—until your kid looks at you and says, “Thanks for being there.”

And suddenly... it all makes sense.

Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?

The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.