What Do Narcissists Do When a Relationship Ends? The Hidden Truth
The Narcissist’s First Reaction: The Silent Treatment
When a relationship ends with a narcissist, the first thing you’ll likely experience is the silent treatment. It's like you've disappeared off the face of the earth. No calls, no texts, not even a passive-aggressive message. The narcissist, who once showered you with attention, now treats you like you’re invisible. It’s chilling, right?
I had a friend, Sarah, who went through this. Her ex, a textbook narcissist, cut all communication abruptly after she ended things. She was left wondering if he even cared at all. Turns out, that’s often the narcissist’s go-to method of control – silence. By ignoring you, they maintain power and deny you closure. It's frustrating, to say the least.
The Narcissist’s Need for Control: Hoovering
Just when you think they’ve forgotten about you, hoovering begins. Hoovering is when the narcissist tries to "suck" you back into their world. It can happen weeks, months, or even years after the breakup. They may try to guilt-trip you into giving them another chance, often by pretending to change or apologizing for their past behavior.
I remember chatting with a colleague, John, about this very thing. He was seeing a narcissistic woman, and after they broke up, she reached out with a long, heartfelt message, claiming how much she’d "changed." But, of course, it was all a façade. It’s one of their favorite tricks – making you believe that you’re the one who’s overreacting or misunderstanding everything.
The Narcissist's Manipulation Techniques During Hoovering
Be cautious if a narcissist reaches out after a breakup. They often use tactics like playing on your guilt or trying to manipulate you into feeling responsible for the relationship's downfall. It’s important to remember: they don’t change. They may apologize, but it’s rarely sincere – it’s more about getting their supply back.
The Narcissist’s Emotional Rollercoaster: Rage and Vindictiveness
If a narcissist doesn’t succeed in hoovering, they can quickly switch to rage and vindictiveness. You’ll likely face intense verbal attacks, blame-shifting, and attempts to ruin your reputation. The narcissist cannot tolerate rejection, and they will often do whatever it takes to hurt you or make you feel worthless.
It’s wild how quickly they can go from being your "soulmate" to your worst enemy. I had a friend, Mark, who dated a narcissist for years. When he ended things, she spread lies about him, trying to destroy his friendships and career. It wasn’t just about the breakup – it was about punishing him for daring to walk away.
The Narcissist’s Need for Narcissistic Supply
This rage stems from their desperate need for narcissistic supply – the attention and validation they constantly crave. When the relationship ends, they feel deprived of that supply, which is why they react so intensely. To a narcissist, this attention is like air – without it, they can’t breathe.
The Narcissist’s Quick Rebound: Moving on to Someone New
One of the most infuriating things about narcissists is how quickly they move on to someone new after the breakup. It’s almost like they can’t bear to be alone. You may find out that they’re already in a new relationship, often with someone who reminds them of you (or at least serves their ego).
It’s not uncommon for a narcissist to jump into another relationship immediately after a breakup. This new person becomes their "narcissistic supply," and they quickly discard them when the novelty wears off. If you’ve been through this, you probably feel like they’ve erased you from their lives – but remember, you’re just another stepping stone for them.
What Should You Do When a Narcissist Breaks Up with You?
If you’ve been in a relationship with a narcissist, getting over it can be incredibly difficult. You may feel emotionally drained, confused, or even angry. But here’s the thing: healing from a relationship with a narcissist takes time. You need to understand that their behavior was never about you, it was always about them.
I’ve made the mistake of trying to "fix" a narcissist before – thinking that if I just loved them enough, they’d change. Spoiler alert: they won’t. The best thing you can do is let go and focus on rebuilding your life. Cut contact (no matter how hard it is), and start focusing on your own well-being.
Don’t Fall for Their Games
If a narcissist reaches out post-breakup, don’t engage in their games. It’s tough, especially when the hoovering starts. But remember: it’s a trap. Stay strong, stay no-contact, and focus on your healing.
Final Thoughts: Protecting Yourself from Narcissistic Abuse
Ending a relationship with a narcissist is never easy, and what happens afterward can feel like an emotional rollercoaster. But you’re not alone in this. Many have walked the same painful path, and there is life after narcissistic abuse.
It’s okay to feel hurt, confused, or angry, but don’t let the narcissist take away your peace. As hard as it is, moving forward is the best way to reclaim your power. And remember, you deserve love that’s real – not just a narcissist’s ego boost.
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Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?
The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.
Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?
How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).
How tall is a average 15 year old?
Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years
| Male Teens: 13 - 20 Years) | ||
|---|---|---|
| 14 Years | 112.0 lb. (50.8 kg) | 64.5" (163.8 cm) |
| 15 Years | 123.5 lb. (56.02 kg) | 67.0" (170.1 cm) |
| 16 Years | 134.0 lb. (60.78 kg) | 68.3" (173.4 cm) |
| 17 Years | 142.0 lb. (64.41 kg) | 69.0" (175.2 cm) |
How to get taller at 18?
Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.
Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?
Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).
Can you grow between 16 and 18?
Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.
Can you grow 1 cm after 17?
Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.