Do Narcissists Obsess Over Someone: Understanding the Dark Reality?

Do Narcissists Obsess Over Someone? The Dark Reality Revealed

Understanding Narcissism: What Drives Obsession?

Well, let’s start by being real about narcissism. It's a term we throw around a lot, but when we get into the nitty-gritty, it’s pretty complex. Narcissists, at their core, crave admiration, validation, and control. But here’s the kicker—they often mask their insecurities with arrogance and entitlement. The truth is, they can obsess over someone, but it’s not what you might think. It’s not love, and it’s not admiration in the healthy sense. It’s about power, manipulation, and yes, a lot of selfishness.

Actually, I had this conversation with a friend last week—she was dealing with a narcissistic ex who seemed to constantly linger in her life, popping up every time she moved on. It’s wild, but I get it now. Narcissists don’t just move on easily. When they "obsess," it’s usually because they feel they’ve lost control of something that was once their source of admiration or power. And trust me, that obsession doesn’t end well for the person they’re fixated on.

The Narcissistic Supply: Why Do They Fixate?

Okay, this might sound a bit strange, but bear with me. Narcissists view people as "narcissistic supply." It sounds a bit cold, but it’s like they need to feed off others' attention and energy. When they latch onto someone, especially someone who provides them with the validation they crave, they tend to fixate. And when that supply is threatened—whether through rejection, a breakup, or even distance—they can become obsessive, trying to reclaim that validation at all costs.

It’s like a drug for them. Think about it: You know how some people become obsessed with a new hobby or even a job, and they won’t let go of it? Well, narcissists do the same with people. If they’ve been "feeding" off your energy, your attention, or even your emotional reaction, they’re going to keep coming back for more. And when that source of energy is pulled away... bam—obsession.

The Stages of Narcissistic Obsession

The Idealization Phase: Everything Is Perfect

Honestly, this phase is dangerous. When a narcissist first starts fixating on you, they idolize you. It's like you can do no wrong in their eyes. They shower you with attention, compliments, and charm. But here’s the thing—this isn’t real love. It’s manipulation. They’re trying to win you over, secure their supply, and make you feel like the most important person in their world. At first, it feels amazing, like you’re the one person who "gets" them.

But trust me—it's only a matter of time before they start shifting gears. When they get what they want (i.e., control or admiration), they’ll suddenly lose interest or shift to devaluing you.

The Devaluation Phase: You’re Not So Perfect Anymore

And here’s where things get ugly. This is where the "obsession" really starts to rear its ugly head. Once a narcissist feels they have you, they’ll begin to devalue you. The person who once was their "perfect match" is now too "flawed." You’ll start seeing more criticism, gaslighting, and emotional manipulation. But here's the kicker: even while they’re tearing you down, they’re still obsessing over you. Why? Because they’ve invested so much of their energy into keeping you around. They’ll keep trying to break you down until they can rebuild you in their image—one that they control.

The Narcissistic Injury: The Catalyst for Obsession

Now, here’s something that I didn’t quite understand until I was in the middle of a situation with a narcissist. When a narcissist feels "injured"—whether you reject them, outsmart them, or leave them—it’s like you’ve hit them where it hurts most: their fragile ego. Honestly, I remember a time when I unintentionally triggered a narcissist’s ego, and boy, the obsession kicked into overdrive. I didn’t understand it at first, but then it hit me: it wasn’t about me—it was about how I made them feel.

The Return of the Narcissist: Why Do They Come Back?

It’s like clockwork. Once a narcissist feels that injury, they always return. It could be months, even years later, but they’ll come back. Why? Because they need that validation again. I had a friend who dealt with this—her ex would pop back into her life every time she started moving on, acting like nothing happened, like everything was fine. But it wasn’t. Narcissists can't stand being ignored or rejected, so they obsessively try to come back to reassert control and get their "supply" back.

Breaking the Cycle: Can Narcissists Truly Let Go?

Here’s the big question: Can narcissists ever truly let go? Honestly? It’s hard to say. I’ve seen a few cases where people were able to break free from the obsession, but it took serious effort and sometimes professional help. Narcissists, by nature, struggle with emotional attachment and empathy, which makes "letting go" feel almost impossible for them. In fact, their obsession often lingers long after the relationship ends, creating a toxic cycle of emotional games.

But let’s not sugarcoat it: breaking free from a narcissist is incredibly difficult. It involves setting clear boundaries, refusing to engage in their manipulation tactics, and being emotionally strong enough to detach from their grip. I’ve seen it firsthand—when someone finally escapes, it’s like watching someone step into the light after years of living in darkness.

Conclusion: Narcissistic Obsession Is Real, But You Can Break Free

Honestly, dealing with a narcissist who is obsessed with you is draining. I’ve been there, and it’s not fun. But here’s the thing: narcissistic obsession isn’t about love. It’s about control. It’s about manipulation. And the only way to stop it is by cutting off their source of validation, setting clear boundaries, and, when necessary, seeking professional help.

So yeah, narcissists do obsess over people, but it’s not love—it’s something far darker. And remember, you don’t have to stay in that cycle. You can break free and reclaim your life.

Is 165 cm normal for a 15 year old?

The predicted height for a female, based on your parents heights, is 155 to 165cm. Most 15 year old girls are nearly done growing. I was too. It's a very normal height for a girl.

Is 160 cm too tall for a 12 year old?

How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

How tall is a average 15 year old?

Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

How to get taller at 18?

Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

Is 5.7 a good height for a 15 year old boy?

Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

Can you grow between 16 and 18?

Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

Can you grow 1 cm after 17?

Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.