Do Narcissists Love to Talk? Understanding the Narcissistic Need for Attention

Narcissists and Their Endless Desire to Be Heard

Well, let me start by saying this – if you've ever spent time with a narcissist, you probably know the answer to this question without even having to read further. Narcissists absolutely love to talk. But it’s not just idle chatter. It’s more like a constant need to center the conversation around themselves. Honestly, they thrive on being the focus, and talking is one of their favorite ways to achieve that.

A recent conversation with a friend of mine, Rachel, really made me realize just how much narcissists dominate conversations. We were at a party, and there was this one person who kept talking about their “amazing achievements,” like, non-stop. I watched as everyone else in the group got quieter and quieter, just nodding along. It’s like they couldn’t stop, and the worst part? They didn’t even seem to notice that no one was interested anymore. Narcissists simply need to talk about themselves to feel validated.

The Need for Validation: Why Narcissists Talk So Much

Narcissists talk because, for them, it’s not just about the conversation itself. It’s about the validation they get from others. When they talk about their successes, they want others to admire them, to agree with how great they are. And if people aren’t giving them that admiration, it often leads to frustration or, worse, manipulation.

I’ve seen it firsthand, too. A colleague of mine, Dave, has this habit of steering every conversation back to his “accomplishments,” even if it’s totally unrelated. At first, I thought it was just an innocent ego boost, but after a while, I realized it was his way of controlling the social dynamic. It’s almost as if he needed us to hear how great he was – without ever stopping to ask how we were doing.

The Narcissistic Monologue: Why It’s So Hard to Get a Word In

Okay, so here’s the thing – it’s not just that narcissists love to talk. It’s that they never seem to stop talking. Ever had a conversation with someone and realized you haven’t gotten a word in for like 30 minutes? Yup, that’s classic narcissism. It’s as if their thoughts are just racing, and they can’t help but spew them out. It’s exhausting.

One time, I sat with a narcissist at a coffee shop for what felt like hours. Every time I tried to contribute, they would just wave it off and continue talking about their latest “project.” It wasn’t even a real conversation, just a one-sided monologue. Honestly, I ended up just sipping my coffee and nodding along, thinking, “When is this going to end?”

The Lack of Listening Skills: Why They Don’t Let You Talk

What’s even more frustrating is that narcissists rarely, if ever, listen. They’re too focused on themselves to truly engage in a back-and-forth conversation. This one-sided dynamic can be draining, and after a while, you might feel like you’re just a bystander in their life, not an actual participant in the conversation. I remember feeling like this with a family member, who was a textbook narcissist. Every conversation would start with them talking about their “issues,” and I was just expected to listen. If I tried to share anything personal, it was met with silence or an attempt to turn it back on them.

Narcissists and Social Interactions: It’s All About Control

Here’s a little twist – narcissists don’t just love talking for the sake of talking. A lot of the time, their need to dominate conversations is about control. They want to control the narrative, the emotions in the room, and the direction of the conversation. This can be really subtle, but once you catch on, it’s pretty obvious.

I had a friend, Mark, who started hanging out with a narcissistic acquaintance. I noticed that whenever Mark would have a success story to tell, this person would immediately jump in with a story that was “bigger” or “better.” It was always about topping the other person, one-upping them, and showing that they were always superior. It’s exhausting, but it’s a classic move for a narcissist – they need to dominate every interaction.

The Power Play: How Narcissists Use Talking to Manipulate

The scariest part? Narcissists can use their talking to manipulate. By dominating a conversation, they can control the flow of information and subtly steer the discussion to serve their own agenda. They can also use their excessive talking as a way to make others feel small or insignificant.

I’ve been in situations where narcissists used their long-winded speeches to gaslight others, making them doubt their own experiences or opinions. They can take a simple discussion and twist it until you start questioning yourself. It’s a power play, and the more they talk, the more control they gain over the people around them.

Can Narcissists Ever Change? Or Is Their Need to Talk Endless?

Honestly, it’s hard to say whether a narcissist can truly change, especially when it comes to their need to talk. From what I’ve observed (and from conversations with mental health professionals), the narcissistic need to dominate conversations is deeply ingrained. It’s tied to their fragile self-esteem and need for validation, and breaking that cycle isn’t easy.

However, there are some cases where narcissists can learn to engage in more balanced conversations, especially with therapy or self-awareness. But, as my friend Carla once said, “It’s a lot of work, and not everyone is willing to put in the effort.” So, while it’s possible for some narcissists to change, it’s definitely not the norm.

Conclusion: Narcissists Love to Talk, But It’s All About Them

At the end of the day, narcissists talk because they need to be heard. They need validation, attention, and control. It’s not necessarily about the content of the conversation; it’s about the emotional payoff they get from it. So, if you’re ever stuck in a conversation with a narcissist, you’ll likely find yourself overwhelmed by their words – and rarely, if ever, heard.

So, what can you do? Well, knowing this can help you manage interactions with narcissists a little better. You can set boundaries, steer the conversation away from them, or even choose not to engage in certain discussions altogether. But remember, if a narcissist loves to talk, it’s because they need the audience. Don’t feel guilty for stepping away when it gets too much.

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How Tall Should a 12 Year Old Be? We can only speak to national average heights here in North America, whereby, a 12 year old girl would be between 137 cm to 162 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/3 feet). A 12 year old boy should be between 137 cm to 160 cm tall (4-1/2 to 5-1/4 feet).

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Average Height to Weight for Teenage Boys - 13 to 20 Years

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Staying physically active is even more essential from childhood to grow and improve overall health. But taking it up even in adulthood can help you add a few inches to your height. Strength-building exercises, yoga, jumping rope, and biking all can help to increase your flexibility and grow a few inches taller.

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Generally speaking, the average height for 15 year olds girls is 62.9 inches (or 159.7 cm). On the other hand, teen boys at the age of 15 have a much higher average height, which is 67.0 inches (or 170.1 cm).

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Most girls stop growing taller by age 14 or 15. However, after their early teenage growth spurt, boys continue gaining height at a gradual pace until around 18. Note that some kids will stop growing earlier and others may keep growing a year or two more.

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Even with a healthy diet, most people's height won't increase after age 18 to 20. The graph below shows the rate of growth from birth to age 20. As you can see, the growth lines fall to zero between ages 18 and 20 ( 7 , 8 ). The reason why your height stops increasing is your bones, specifically your growth plates.